Sunday, February 14, 2010
Good Money Cant Win
Poker has felt like getting gang raped in a prison for retards. I had Saturday by my lonesome for a change so decided to play the 2/5 NL game at the Belle casino. Pretty much the first player I notice is this little old cajun man in a golf hat who plays poker like we did when we were 8 years old for candy. He saw every flop no matter what and would try to buy everypot or just call people down if he happened to have a hand as big as bottom pair. The kind of guy you pray for basically. I basically play a few pots and stay evenish. Then I pic up AK. The UTG guy min raises to 10 and crazy cajun calls and the guy who looks likke wolfman jack calls. I decide to isolated the UTG guy who obviously has a small pair. I raise to like 65. All 3 called and one maniac behind me called. The flop comes AA5 with 2 diamonds. I go ahead and bet like 85. I want whoever has A9 to think I'm scared and put it in. Well crazy cajun calls and no one else. Oh well. The turn is another diamond. Cajun bets 150 into me. I am not sold on his flush so I call. The river is another diamond. A 4 of diamonds. Fuck me. He puts me all in. I fold. He shows. He didn't have a diamond. He had pocket 4s. Nice boat. Later him and this big Aaron Neville looking guy get in a pot where the river makes a flush and a stright for anyone with a nine. The black guy checks to cajun and cajun bets 100. Black guy reraises all in for 300 more and stares at cajun like its WWE wrestling. Cajun calls. They both had a 9. Its like watching monkeys hump a football. A while later I turned a set of 2s in a limp pot with no action on the flop. I bet it and Wolfman called, Cajun called and big scary guy called. Wolfman tells me that now I got the cajun guy on the hook. I figured he was strong since he was encouraging me while he was in the pot. Well the board pairs on the end and I bet. Wolfman moves in for like $300 more. I'm sure he has a boat. He musta had 53 or 23. I fold my boat and he tries to convince me he had top pair with a queen kicker. Ok buddy. Anyway my lst pot I had J9 and limped after 2 guys. Well big guy makes it $20 and no one folds. I call 15 more and flop is J94 and we all check to raiser. I think he has AA. He bets pot $80. Flods around to me and I make it $280. He thinks for aminute and moves in. I call. He has KK. K on the turn. I get up cussin and went Phil Helmuth on him calling him a fucking idiot who shoulda known he was beat. I walked out cussin and talkin bout how I can't win no matter what and how its like playing poker against monkeys at the zoo (not in a racial way btw).
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25 comments:
Hey man, Just ran across you blog, because it is connected to monkey's. Quit crying about the beats, sounds pitiful. Seems that you think your a good player, and from the hands you describe, your not. Might want to talk poker with someone better than you, and try to get better.
Jimmy, Ft. Walton FL.
Thanks Jimmy. No Im pretty clear that Im not a good player. BUT I do see where I get my money in good and lose constantly. Thats just a mathmatical fact. Im very convinced however that I beg for these situations by not pushing all in a lot of the time. Anyway I only want to talk about bad beats cause what else would you have me do. You say Im a bad player so I certainly shouldnt be giving poker advice (even though Im sure I have). I guess its all relative. Im a bad player compared to you but Im a good player compared to your mom. BTW tell her I had a good time last night but her cooking is fucked up.
Childish comments. Grow up.
Did you expect more from the Sofa King?
Not really, Just thought that you might treat your only reader a little better.
You got it backwards. Im your only reader. ok Jimmy what poker do you play? Online or live? Whats stakes? I wanna know. How did you do last year?
Just goofing on you fagstick! Just the same person who was fucking goofing on you months ago(the last time your dumb ass blog had a comment). Remember the 1-2 game at hooters? But you do suck donkey dicks at poker, fagmo!!!!!! Might want to quit. Just shut the fuck up about your bad beats!! Nobody wants to hear it. Oh yeah, nobody does!!!!
joy
What do you think the chances of going broke are in this scenario? You start with $100. You flip a coin for a dollar over and over again.
Me? In 100 coin flips. Seriously though, I guess eventually you would have a bad enough run to go broke. But it would have to be a pretty bad run. I dont see where the analogy applies though. Im certainly not 50/50 when Im getting busted.
100% of the time you will go broke. There is no probability to it. If you do it long enough, you will go broke. I used it as an example of how bad bad can be. It makes me think that avoiding even close calls would be preferable for a big chunk of your bankroll even though they may be +EV. Or I need to reevaluate my bankroll requirements drastically to something like 200 buy ins.
Marc, Dont try to talk sense to this fucking idiot! Hes just another dumb ass redneck who thinks he can play poker because he sometimes wins at his home game.
Then he ventures into the casino once in a while with his $300 bankroll, gets dusted off by some old lady who floped a set on his aces, then comes on here and cries about another bad beat. Then, the first time he gets his crappy online account above $1000, he takes a piture of it and posts it on here like thats some big accomplishment. Then he "DANCES A JIG". And at one time he thought he had a following on his blog, because there was 25 comments. His dumb ass didnt even know it was the same person, dumb ass!!!! Hey sofa, come play in the 1-2 hooters game tonight!!!! Ha! If I even thought i could get a shot at that little bank roll, I would really have a game at Hooters and invite You. Idiot!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I musta fucked this dudes girlfriend. No one could be that big of a loser and care that much about my blog without it being personal. Im sorry bro. I was drunk.
Losers like you, dont get to fuck anybodys girlfriend! Ive seen the pigs you hang with. A pig even dumped you. So try something else!!
Sorry bro!
ok you win. i date pigs. pigs dump me constantly. go forth and win you monster pots of highstakes poker. Im sure your at the table right now with some big tv tournamnet star and taking their money.
OK I WIN!!!! Just dont talk about fucking someones girlfriend, when you hang out with ugly pigs!! It might give your 2 readers the false impression that you could fuck someones girlfriend if you wanted too! And you cant. Only fatties and trolls!
Keep playing bad poker, keeps the rest of us in money!! Dumb ass.
oh Im sorry. Was that girlfriend thing getting too personal mr anonymous? I just have a hard time believing that someone who has spent so much time reading a blog that nobody wants to read and wastes his time calling the writer an idiot when it clearly states in his title "so fucking retarded" could possibly be a winning poker player. I dont mind this back and forth shit but you really should ask yourself why you shouldnt just shoot up an overdose of heroin and find the white light. This is no way to live.
Are you 12 or 13?
Time to read your blog, takes 45 seconds, dumb ass.
look if your here to interact with 12 or 13 year old boys you can just take it somewhere else pedo.
Go dance a jig with your little fatty!!!
No, I was just trying to figure out if you were acting like a 12 year old to try to pick up 12 year olds! fagmo!! Since the only tricks you can pick up are little piggys! And you know it. Look who you hang out with. HA HA HA!!! Idiot.
fagmo? really?
I would say running your account from $20 to 1k is an accomplishment. I doubt many can do it. I think he's pissed cause he just found out he's raising your kid.
I got caught up in reading this stuff...got a new curse word out of it..."FAGMO" LMAO!
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